www.shore104.com
Click on the Morning Show page to find my meandering stream of unconsciousness (yes, that would be the blog). If there’s anything comedy or music-related that you’d like me to explore – drop me a note.

and

www.shoresoundsofsummer.com
Check out Comedy Kick and also take some time to peruse the musical-themed ramblings from fellow on-air type, Dug Joy. You’ll also have a chance to listen to the amazing talent of our Sounds of Summer Musician Finalists. I’m in awe of the talent in this city.

On a high note….

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Parisien waiters recognized Marceau’s passing by giving the silent treatment to American tourists (a gesture which initially began in 1934 in anticipation of Mr. Marceau’s death). The initiative was so successful, the French tourism board has decided to extend it to August 10th, 2018.

French Prime Minister Nicolas Sarkozy held his own tribute, commenting: “Let’s have a big old game of charades, shall we?!” Ministerial staff were seen to roll their eyes in anticipation of Sarkozy’s annual, snicker-fueled rendition of Winnie the Pooh.

Upon finally removing Mr. Marceau’s make-up, embalmers were shocked to discover the identify of one Jimmy Hoffa. The Reverends Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson were, reportedly, on their way to Paris (just because).

In honour of Marcel Marceau – two minutes of raucous noise.

I’d call myself Miss Penny Candy and adorn my body with edible bling (candy necklace, earrings to match). I’d carry a concealed licorice whip in my handbag, and one of those trick Juicy Fruit packs that snap clean the finger bones off any unsuspecting gum-taker. Upon command, my Pez dispenser would release a venomous vapour (not unlike that of patchouli) rendering a rival spy unconscious within seconds. Once bound and awake, the prisoner would be subjected to an endless loop of ‘Full House’ (Season 2, Episode 7 ‘Uncle Jesse gets a haircut’) until the enemy’s secret code was divulged (usually within 8 to 12 minutes).

Each day, I’d artfully arrange myself upon my desk in a variety of film-noir poses, ensconsed in flickering green and red hues from a neighbouring Quizno’s sign. Taking long, slow draws on my chocolate cigarette, I’d gaze at the ceiling and indulge in my prediliction for uber-spy foreign languages (Urdu, Swahili, Gaelic, Stephen Hawking) while uttering sensual, yet philosophical, gems such as:

“I need somewhere to blot my lipstick. Can I use your lips?”

“Flattery will get you nowhere Agent X. But, don’t stop trying.”

“Nietzsche…..just wasn’t my type.”

I can’t fax, file, unjam the photocopier or make coffee (unless it’s to poison the enemy). Who cares?

“Miss Penny Candy, take a memo.”

Oh….I think not.

Gum, anyone?

Life as an Insurance Supermodel isn’t as glamorous as some think.

Way back, a Bachelor’s Degree and a further two-year specialization in Broadcast Journalism landed me at CKNW Radio, Western Canada’s top newsroom in the 90’s. I thrived and learned from the pros. Hell, it was almost two years, before I took my first lunch break.

Sure, we covered regional and national news. But, we also focused on world events. Some of my most memorable journalistic moments: Covering F.W. de Klerk’s release of Nelson Mandela; the subsequent rise of the ANC; the tearing down of the Berlin Wall; the execution of Romania’s Socialist Dictator, Ceausescu; the American invasion of Panama – along with a secret interview with an escaped hostage hiding in Panama City after Panamanian Troops seized a busload of American tourists. This ‘get’ was the highlight of my journalistic career. (After the interview, CNN was still reporting it was unsure of the escaped hostage’s whereabouts).

From there – I hosted a variety of television interview shows on business, health, and the arts. A far cry from my hard news roots.

And, then, five years ago: Stand-up Comedy. A chance to scribble about human quirks and oddities as opposed to shootings and politics. Stand-up pushed the boundaries of my creative mind. FINALLY, I could harness those immature brain meanderings and craft them into something productive. But, this time, I was the topic. Nobody laughs, claps, or groans when you read the news. But, stand on a stage – your soul stripped bare. The reaction is immediate. The taste, not unlike gun metal. Stand-up changed my life in so many wonderful ways.

HELL – why not combine all of the above?

Result: My newest career – Co-Host and News Anchor for the Morning Show at SHORE 104 Radio in Vancouver. Find it on the dial at 104.1 FM or listen online at www.shore104.com. I’m honored to sit alongside the warm, yet oh so cool, Steve Dunbar (not to mention THE most dedicated and talented team of co-workers I’ve ever encountered). SHORE 104 is a bright, new station for educated listeners. No classic rock, golden oldies or rehashing of the familiar. Its mission: The art of music – specifically Roots, Rock, & Rhythm. A celebration of the iconic singer/songwriter. The new. The undiscovered. I promise you, the tunes will lay down fresh pathways in your cerebral cortex.

It’s the unfamiliar that makes life challenging.
In music.
And, life.

Thanks to all who listen regularly.
Especially those from outside Vancouver.

I love that you’re tuning in.

There were no gaps.

Bloody well brilliant.

Thanks to you, Norm MacDonald. The only comic who can quip about the most horrific and morbid topics – while still garnering adoration from guys and gals alike.

And, yeah – I’ll keep up the stand-up. Heckler dude aside.

You make us smile. You also give a mean face wash.

(Why do I look like Carney Wilson in this photo? Why is there a moo moo thing going on)?

39 sleeps until the Olympics.

Unless you’re Keith Richards,

Then – two sleeps.

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